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Illusion Conclusion
Jerry Stocking
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Illusion Conclusion — Core (16 Tapes)
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Tape 10 – Side A
Tape 10 – Side A
IC_T10A
44:58
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Transcript
349 utterances · click to jump
00:02
S0
Molly wanted to make sure that it worked for everybody. Linda
00:08
S0
went to lunch.
00:17
S1
I noticed that people really wanted to fill in the blanks.
00:24
S1
And we, at one point, just said, I need help. And he gave us directions. He didn't even know where we wanted to go.
00:32
S0
It doesn't matter.
00:37
S1
Get down here, take a U-turn, come back, you're right there. Michael.
00:45
S0
Yeah, that's when you say this is very complicated.
00:52
S0
Tell me how often you've had a conversation that couldn't have been carried on more effectively by two cassette tapes,
01:00
S0
especially if it was an argument.
01:07
S0
At least in chess, there are different pieces.
01:12
S0
What else? What'd you notice over lunch?
01:15
S2
There was one lady who was the leader of the pack that we went to for the restaurant servers, and she was not in a good mood whatsoever. And she got kind of I went up to her, and I was like, I need help. And she turns around and looks at me. She's like, well, what? And then she's I don't have all day. And then I was just like, Michael? And she just looked at me, and she's kinda ticked off. And then I just said, Michael again? And she was just like and then walked away. And then all throughout the rest of the time we were there, we're yell yelling out to Michael, and this is very complicated and mostly Michael. But by the time that we left and we went to another
02:05
S0
place Are you thinking of kissing her while you're doing this? I don't want you to think of anything else. I didn't even get one thought of kissing her while you were doing this. You're sitting next door, man. Come on.
02:24
S0
Keep going.
02:25
S2
Alright. And when That's good.
02:33
S2
Didn't even notice I did that. But and this is impossible to do if I am thinking
02:40
S0
It isn't. Yeah. Because you've got seven plus or minus two. You can talk using two or three of that seven plus or minus two.
02:48
S2
And have the rest on her?
02:50
S0
Yeah. Why would you ever take it off of her? Your trick is to get her attention off of her and your attention on her.
03:03
S2
Okay.
03:03
S0
What if you didn't need all seven plus or minus two to tell us this pathetic story that no one's interested in?
03:09
S2
Sure they are.
03:11
S0
Maybe not. They aren't.
03:14
S0
They aren't because you aren't giving them anything. You're running through your seven plus or minus two over and over again, and they're not interested. Mhmm. But as soon as you sit there and you think about kissing her while you're doing it, now they're wondering what's gonna happen.
03:34
S0
So she. Come on. Okay.
03:42
S0
And you don't even have to look at her to do it. You can do it anyway. What if by Friday, he's able to talk to you
03:53
S0
and not only think about kissing her?
03:57
S2
And You can just
03:58
S0
fill in the blank.
03:58
S3
I want you to
03:59
S0
finish it. By
04:03
S0
the time I finish it, you won't be paying attention anymore.
04:15
S0
Can hear too.
04:24
S2
And by the time when we got
04:25
S0
If you ever talk about something other than sex, what business have you got doing so? Uh-huh. Could you imagine he walks in and he says, it appears to me that we're gonna really have to do some work on those wisdom teeth.
04:48
S0
Look at him. They wouldn't mind, would they? No. No. They wouldn't mind at all.
04:58
S0
I mean, as long as all the products products get sold with it, why not sell yourself with it too? Go ahead.
05:07
S1
Kiss. Kiss.
05:10
S2
I'm here more. Okay. And by the time we left and we came back, there we walked we walked past
05:22
S0
Stop, he says. You're not doing it. I'm trying. He wants more sex. The dentist wants more sex, and that's really something.
05:33
S2
I'll give it to you. Go open the pictures.
05:34
S0
Okay. Go.
05:45
S4
No. Prepare.
05:46
S0
You need to figure out precisely how ridiculous you are.
05:54
S0
All of you. I know. You need to figure out precisely how ridiculous you are because that's the shortest road to entertainment.
06:08
S0
Don't you? Think of some of the opportunities you've missed
06:16
S0
this morning.
06:19
S0
Not even last week, just this morning. How
06:27
S0
much fun can you have?
06:30
S0
And who said you couldn't?
06:35
S0
Abuse is that you touch them before you've done all this other stuff.
06:42
S0
You have to do all the creating and stuff first. Abuse is
06:50
S0
this is a quote from our last Houston course. The triumph of your insecurities over their securities.
07:00
S0
Don't miss the chance to take your insecurities and lay them right out there where everybody in the world can see them.
07:14
S0
Everybody can see them because guess what? If you don't have those to hide, you got nothing to hide.
07:23
S0
Flirting is bringing those insecurities right out front instead of talking one more time business as usual.
07:34
S0
It's it's tough though because it's like a quota. If you start doing that, you're gonna wanna keep doing it. And if you keep doing it, you're gonna wanna kinda up up it a little bit. And pretty soon, you got so much energy flowing through you. You don't know which end you're on, and pretty soon, conversations disappear in your head, and pretty soon, you don't stub your toes anymore. And pretty soon, you just, oh, shocks. Wouldn't that be the pits? If it just started going that direction
08:05
S0
you thinking of her? Mhmm. It's okay, ain't it?
08:12
S0
Is she thinking of you?
08:14
S2
I think so.
08:16
S0
Who cares what you think? You get it?
08:19
S2
Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you feel so.
08:23
S0
What
08:26
S0
else? What'd you notice over lunch? Kind of fun using the phrases? They don't care, do they, except in an upward direction? Well,
08:39
S5
we went to a Mexican restaurant and
08:42
S0
Uncross. Mhmm. Getting in some stance that you normally wouldn't get in
08:49
S0
because that was business as usual.
08:52
S0
Okay.
08:53
S5
Okay. We went to a Mexican restaurant and what I I noticed was outside of the waitress the waitress and the maitre d' and the people around us, I felt that
09:05
S1
the
09:05
S0
crew You're thinking of him?
09:07
S5
Dave?
09:08
S0
Yeah. No. Why not? He's kind of a handsome guy sitting right next to you. There you go. That's it.
09:18
S0
Yeah. Keep going.
09:21
S0
Noticed the difference? Here she goes.
09:24
S5
I noticed the group that I was with. This is what
09:27
S0
It just softens her up. You see it? It just softens her up. The softer you can get, the better off you are.
09:46
S0
I'm not talking about some disease which loses you the calcium in your bones.
09:52
S5
I know what you're talking about.
09:54
S0
Don't miss the chance. Okay.
10:01
S1
I thought about it.
10:03
S0
Now you got all their attention. You got everybody's attention.
10:08
S5
Okay.
10:08
S0
And before, they were fighting to try and be polite to pay attention to you.
10:12
S5
They wanted to listen to me.
10:14
S0
Yeah. Right.
10:16
S5
I noticed that this is what Or else? No.
10:21
S5
I don't think so.
10:24
S0
That was in or else too, wasn't it? I
10:28
S5
felt, and this was my perception, my story, but I think that I might have annoyed some of the people that were at the table with me.
10:39
S0
So you noticed that you annoyed them?
10:43
S0
Consider that being progress.
10:46
S5
By being verbal. Because I did I did most of the talking in this language, and I don't know. I I sense that a couple people were taken aback by that, by my forwardness, And I was just playing the game.
11:04
S5
And that's what I that's what I perceived.
11:07
S0
Okay.
11:10
S0
So what's the reading in the room right now of what you perceive of how they are perceiving you?
11:16
S5
They don't like me right now.
11:18
S0
It's not about you.
11:20
S5
They don't like yourselves.
11:21
S0
Believe a word you're saying. They know that you do, and they don't get any substance to it.
11:29
S5
So what I perceived at the table was just my perception and it wasn't real?
11:34
S0
Yes. And they know that. Really? Yes. They can't help but know it.
11:46
S5
Then why did I feel that?
11:48
S0
You really gotta use other people. It was useful to keep your illusion in place.
11:55
S5
But I was connected to them.
11:57
S0
I don't doubt it.
11:59
S5
So why would I want to have kept that illusion in place?
12:05
S0
I'm we're too late in the course for whys.
12:11
S0
You asked me why and I answered it, so please don't come on with another why.
12:16
S5
Where where would you get that that idea that I would do that?
12:21
S0
I could tell that you did by observing them here. It didn't open it more. It didn't produce more energy. It shut it down.
12:30
S5
And I felt that energy shut down.
12:32
S0
And they plain out didn't buy your report, and you did and that's where the miss occurred.
12:40
S5
Okay. So then I don't I'm missing Try a different report. I'm I'm sorry? Try a completely different report. Okay. When we left the
12:50
S1
How are doing now? This
12:53
S0
is fine recording. Got the truth, you got nobody and nobody.
13:01
S5
When you have the truth, you have nobody?
13:04
S0
And nobody. You just have the truth.
13:08
S5
Which is my story.
13:10
S0
Which is just all made up stuff. But what if If it's made up and tremendously entertaining, congratulations.
13:17
S5
But what if it is the truth?
13:18
S0
There is no truth, sweetheart.
13:19
S5
But what if you ask one of the people that I had lunch with that that they agreed with me?
13:24
S0
They're already raising their hand to disagree with you. Okay. He's not going to agree with you. Okay. How do I know?
13:31
S5
This will
13:32
S0
It's my job.
13:33
S5
But this would be interesting to find out if To you. How I
13:38
S0
It's not interesting to me because I already know.
13:41
S5
But it would be but I'm taking the course. It would be interesting to me to
13:44
S0
find leading the course. I tell you what's interesting.
13:51
S5
Okay. I'll I'll give that to you.
13:58
S0
No. I already took it.
14:03
S0
What you're doing here is you're distrusting your own reading on what you got from the group when you were talking
14:12
S0
because you got it. I watched you get it. Mhmm. And then you made up a story about it.
14:22
S5
So I'm really fucked up.
14:23
S0
No. Just watch the stories. And if the stories justify anything, throw them out. And if they're entertaining, enjoy them.
14:36
S0
That story didn't entertain you.
14:39
S5
No. It didn't.
14:40
S0
No. It didn't.
14:41
S5
But why did I why
14:44
S5
I felt the need to know if what I felt was actual.
14:49
S0
It isn't a feeling. It's a conversation in your head.
14:53
S5
Oh, okay. Then I felt the need
14:54
S0
led by pictures and then comes down to a conversation in your head. What did you feel in your body? This is for everybody, you guys. She's missing the distinction of physical sensations versus conversations. You had a conversation in your head that you offended people at the table. And then right after that, you had a conversation in your head that they shouldn't have been offended. Mhmm.
15:22
S5
That I might have offended.
15:24
S0
And this is not the first time you've ever done this beautiful little sequence. First of all, perceiving something that's not there and then saying it shouldn't be there,
15:35
S0
and then suffering because it is. And in your pay case suffering is often anger. First of all, it wasn't there. Second of all, this shouldn't be there puts you in a position of God which you have no business being in anyway. Goddess.
15:57
S0
I figured God's female, so it would be God Goddess, wouldn't it? Well,
16:07
S5
if you think that I'm a man, I guess so.
16:10
S0
No. I think that God is female.
16:14
S0
So God is God, so then you've to do something different for the male image of God, which let's make it Goddess. Do you understand?
16:23
S5
I understand.
16:26
S0
Do you get that that's what you do regularly? You look around and you assess what's going on, and then you assess that that isn't what should be going on. Does this sound familiar to any of you?
16:36
S1
Oh, yeah. Once or twice.
16:38
S0
You assess what's going on. You don't necessarily check it out out here. You decide what's going on, and then you decide that it shouldn't be.
16:50
S0
Now see at the point, once you've decided what's going on, you're damned if you right there, you're damned. You know what damned means? Blocked. Blocked. I mean, Blocked. Mhmm. You're damned.
17:06
S0
So then whether you decide that it should or it shouldn't, you lose.
17:12
S0
Because first of all, you block it and then you preside over it
17:19
S0
by your large ass.
17:22
S0
I'm not poking fun at you. I'm poking sad at you. And at everybody else in the room who does this, which is most of the people, some of them to a huge degree, some of them to a much smaller degree. There are very different degrees of doing this in the room. And there are different degrees depending on the situation you're in. The
17:47
S0
more you love the person, the more apt you are to do this.
17:53
S0
And hold on to it no matter what. And really let them know they shouldn't because the more you love them, the more threatened you are in your interactions with them and the tighter you hold to the stuff. This is just a classic case of I've decided it's this way and I've decided it shouldn't be.
18:14
S0
You made it all up.
18:19
S0
How often do you make it up like that?
18:25
S0
What's the purpose behind the whole game? The purpose behind the whole game is that you get to be allegedly in charge even though it's a pretty stinky place to be in charge.
18:37
S0
You build yourself a world in which you wouldn't want to preside.
18:43
S0
That's the and you just illustrated beautifully the technique. You go, it is this way, ungrounded assessment, right? Mhmm. And it shouldn't be.
18:58
S0
That's a a proclamation from a deity.
19:03
S0
That's it's just the one two punch to knock you out.
19:09
S5
And it does.
19:10
S0
Yeah. And even, by the way, what they say doesn't really matter because what's the likelihood that they have any clue of what's going on? They aren't even authorities on whether or not they were offended. I mean it. They aren't. If they live offended almost all the time, then they call that not offended.
19:36
S0
So you can't trust you and you can't trust them. What can you do then? You can play.
19:41
S0
Oh, shucks.
19:43
S5
Which we did.
19:44
S0
Yeah. Don't doubt it.
19:45
S5
Can I tell you what happened next? Sure.
19:46
S0
Because this is a good one. As long as you make sure you include him in it and him in it. I want two men include
19:52
S5
Okay.
19:52
S0
Not in the story, but in part of your seven plus or minus two, I want you necking with these two dudes with no preference for which one. Okay.
20:05
S0
So you can put anything in your seven plus or minus two. And if the same thing occupies all seven plus or minus two, you are the bore of the universe.
20:20
S0
And if you go, oh, I kinda like him. But meanwhile, you're making pictures of not liking him, then you're just torn up inside. If you're talking to the people at the table while thinking with part of your seven plus or minus two that they aren't liking what you're doing,
20:41
S0
it undercuts you the whole time. Boy, you you build a place you have to leave,
20:48
S0
and you do. And there's only one human upset, and that's the loss of the present. It's the only one there is, and you call it so many different names, and that's the only one there is. Yeah. Tell us, would you? I won't interrupt for at least thirty seconds.
21:05
S5
Even even with that, I felt I was I felt very comfortable. Even with that, I felt very comfortable with the group that I went out with, and I had I had a really great time.
21:17
S0
Comfortable is not a feeling.
21:29
S5
Anyway, we went to
21:33
S5
we we finished early, so we went into a couple of stores. But no. This one is funny. We went to a Gibson
21:38
S0
From New York. Anyone from New York or New Jersey can say more in the word anyway.
21:45
S5
Forget about it, Jerry.
21:47
S0
Anyway. In other words, despite your existence.
21:55
S0
Anyway
22:00
S5
Only only in the East. Right? Northeast. Right? New Jersey or or New York. That happens.
22:04
S0
Okay. California, they can only say, hey.
22:10
S0
They can't even admit you exist in California. In New York, they gotta try and kill you. In California, they don't know you exist yet.
22:22
S0
How many of you are from California? We got you. We got you. I did a word of warning. People from California normally hate this course.
22:32
S0
I'm just warning you. We have a hard time staying in contact with them after the course because they don't return calls and they don't return emails. They are so Fred finally reached this guy after the August course, and it's like he's left so many messages, and this guy was really neat for most of the course, then disappeared toward the end. He said, when I run into something I don't like,
23:02
S0
I smoke a lot of pot.
23:06
S0
And he's this really clean-cut looking guy. And I didn't like a lot of what I saw about myself in the course. So I've been smoking pot. This is, like, five weeks later. Entirely too much pot.
23:25
S0
I go, oh, no. I've driven him to pot. No. You don't think he did pot before it, do you? No.
23:33
S0
Entirely too much before it, entirely too much after it. We may not have changed something there.
23:41
S0
We aren't going to lead one in California. We will never have a course in California. They are all already enlightened.
23:54
S0
I
23:57
S0
I would take New York anytime, anyway. Yeah. Anytime.
24:05
S0
Tell us the really, really, really funny part while thinking of these two guys.
24:08
S5
The really funny cute story, which was the best part of the whole lunch, was going into this little gift store and Neil Diamond was singing Sweet Caroline.
24:22
S0
I love that.
24:23
S5
And I'm very sorry but I forgot your name. What? Yes. Catherine. Catherine, I had such a good time with you today, by the way. Thank you. Catherine started dancing around the store
24:34
S0
and Jealous, Matthew?
24:39
S0
If you aren't, you're missing an opportunity here. Don't you let anybody else have a good time with your girl for a while here.
24:46
S1
We had a Matthew, we had
24:47
S5
a great time with her today.
24:52
S5
We had did we have a good time? Yes. We had a great time
24:55
S0
That's out the tendency in illusion. He's gonna glare at you.
24:58
S5
I know. It's mad at me.
24:59
S0
When what he ought to be doing is looking over at her. He'd rather fight than
25:06
S5
Than switch.
25:08
S0
Some beginning with f. But
25:13
S0
it's a standard mistake in our culture. Yeah. Yeah. Look what you did to my girlfriend. You quit looking at my girlfriend like that. You quit. He doesn't know who he's looking at. You know? He's looking at the other guy. This is a latent condition. Yeah.
25:34
S5
So we all we all pursue we all proceeded to dance around the store, and we sang the we used these words to sing parts of the song, and we were all getting into it, Molly and all of us. And I noticed that the the lady at the at the counter, she had her back towards us, and she was wrapping up the gift or something. And she was she was hysterical. She was laughing at what we were doing, and we just had a blast. It was it was the greatest time. A lot of fun. Yeah. And I've said enough.
26:07
S0
Pair up, please.
26:09
S0
Got to do this one without chairs. So scoot your chairs a little bit out of your way please. Please refer to the broken heart exercise in your booklet.
26:23
S0
Okay. The exercise goes something like this. Here's the exercise. Now you got to bring all your congruity to bear, all your visual auditory kinesthetic has to pull together for this exercise. Okay?
26:40
S0
She looks over at Judy and she says, come here. And she really means it. She does it as congruently as she possibly can, meaning, right in this communication is, if you don't come here, I will die. There's nothing else in the world I want but you to come here. That's it. Compared to anything else in the world, I'm not interested. I just want you to come here. Okay? She's got to deliver it like that.
27:19
S0
And take whatever time you need to
27:23
S0
then she brings forth everything she possibly can, all the anger she possibly can, and she tells Judy to get away. Not dramatizing it a lot, just
27:37
S0
and dramatizing it a little bit. What the
27:39
S1
heck?
27:41
S1
Get away.
27:44
S1
Tell
27:46
S0
her to come here.
27:50
S0
Now be pathetic and really need her so badly.
27:57
S0
Come here.
27:59
S0
Got it? That's the exercise. And you watch what goes on. How often are you abandoned?
28:08
S0
I mean, certainly every few seconds by somebody for sure. Mhmm. I want you to experience the emotions but have them be content free. Find out what goes on. Find out what goes on if you open up. It's now time to have some broken hearts because that ups the quality of relationship. Look at her now.
28:37
S0
What you avoid is what you have to have in a relationship. These two have one now. Look. You get it?
28:46
S5
Yes, sir.
28:46
S0
And so does she.
28:51
S0
You have to have an independent broken heart and you end up with relationship.
28:58
S0
And that's what you guys try and avoid. You got to do it everywhere. So it's the Khmer getaway and really as deep as you possibly can in it. And I'll tell you when to switch. K?
29:18
S0
What'd you notice? Highly emotional. Highly emotional?
29:23
S1
Yeah.
29:23
S0
K.
29:24
S1
I had a lot of energy both ways, and it felt kind of the same in
29:30
S0
my going on. Felt kind
29:32
S1
of the same in my body both ways, which I was very surprised.
29:37
S0
And here she is. You see her? Yes. There she is.
29:45
S1
Vulnerability comes out, doesn't it?
29:47
S0
Yeah. Do you know that vulnerability is one of the few things you have?
29:54
S0
For sure? All the time.
29:56
S1
Though. I feel that way all the time.
29:59
S0
Horse shit.
30:00
S1
Horse shit. Well, I well, a great deal of the time I do. I'm close to tears most of the time.
30:10
S0
Let them come out
30:12
S1
Okay.
30:14
S0
Instead of being close to them and being mean.
30:17
S3
They know what he's mean.
30:18
S0
I know.
30:18
S3
Mean to be.
30:19
S0
I know. Okay.
30:22
S0
Any of you can imagine perhaps that you sometimes unintentionally produce results in others? Just from time to every once in a long while.
30:35
S3
Yeah. Okay. I noticed when he was telling me to come here
30:41
S0
eye patterns.
30:43
S3
When he was telling me to come here, I felt a constriction in my chest.
30:49
S3
I also felt it when I said come here. And when I said go away, it was more like a it was still a feeling it or a feeling in my chest, but it was
31:03
S3
it wasn't a constriction. It was kind of like a the opposite.
31:07
S0
Okay.
31:10
S6
I felt like the exercise was making me go in and out of my body.
31:17
S6
When the person would say go away and I would come close, the coming close had a emotionally charged energy all its own. And the words came in and the words kind of ended up just kind of passing through, and then the body movement took over. And then pretty soon the words didn't make any difference. And then the time between that happening came a little faster to the point where the words just kinda it was just a cue to do something. And that something that that I was doing was more important and that she was doing was more important than the words.
31:54
S0
Do you know how many people allegedly get divorced over words? It's not about the words. It has nothing to do with the words. They don't get married over the words. They don't get divorced over the words. It has nothing to do with it. That's what comes along afterwards, Afterwards.
32:14
S0
Okay? What else? What'd you notice?
32:17
S4
When I was going through the exercise, I could actually see people. But I'd said, come here and go away, and I cleared out, you know, some of the junk that's been in my head. I can actually feel it and just, like, dissolve.
32:35
S0
What if you didn't need to fool around with control of other people ever? Yes, sir. Wouldn't that be weird? I mean, does she look awful or what? Do you see it? Can you tell?
32:50
S1
Can I tell?
32:51
S0
I'm gonna try this again. Yeah. Can you tell?
32:56
S1
Can I tell how easier much easier it would be?
32:58
S0
No. How awful you look. No. Can you guys tell?
33:05
S0
Look at her. You gotta be able to look at whatever's there. She just had an invitation to go deeper and didn't take it.
33:15
S1
Yeah. I sent the facade. I can't
33:17
S0
That's it.
33:18
S1
To see it.
33:18
S0
This is the facade. It's not her. She went, it's an abandonment thing. I ain't playing.
33:26
S0
Yep. That's what happens when you don't play. You look more and more like this.
33:33
S0
And when you do play, you look more and more like that. That's the difference. And you've got to know that all the time.
33:44
S0
Hon, you don't even know that you've softened about 30% in the last few days.
33:49
S1
I know I have.
33:50
S0
Do you?
33:51
S1
I weep all the time at the motel in here too.
33:54
S0
Congratulations. You've softened, but it's not about weeping. It's just about softening now open to people. Look at them. Open to all of them. That's it. They're here for you. Even though they may not ever do anything for you, they're still here for you.
34:14
S0
Got a little abandonment thing there.
34:19
S0
These aren't quite ready to take care of yet. We gotta work on this abandonment issue.
34:26
S0
Come back next week.
34:29
S1
Oh,
34:32
S0
I got vacation next week. Come back in a month or two. Pay the receptionist.
34:41
S0
So you've been abandoned a lot. I don't care who you are. You've been abandoned a lot. If you're talking to somebody and they take their attention away how many of you have been caught like that and you go and talk and but you know they're not listening and you're and when and you just sort of run out? Well, they have a limited amount of attention. So why why would they give it to you?
35:08
S0
So tell me a little something that I really should know. Okay?
35:12
S1
Something that you really should know?
35:14
S0
Yeah. Lecture me just a little.
35:15
S1
Okay. Well, your your teeth are a little bit yellow,
35:23
S1
and you are chewing your nails. You're cleaning your nails with your teeth. Oh, and you're picking at your nails. That makes my skin crawl.
35:39
S7
And you really ought not to do
35:40
S1
that because it bothers me.
35:45
S0
This is most of your life, you guys. They don't care.
35:51
S0
And especially if they tell you they care, they don't care.
35:57
S0
They don't care. He doesn't care. I mean, you already know that. But you don't care either.
36:06
S0
Why? Because caring would put you both at risk instantly.
36:12
S0
You don't wanna be at risk. That makes no sense at all.
36:19
S0
So what happens if here they are and he looks at her and he says, get away no. He says, come here. Say come here and really mean it.
36:35
S0
Come here. And he keeps a picture of her in his head.
36:41
S0
Got a picture? Mhmm. How is this?
36:45
S0
It hurts. Where? Right in here. Okay. So now have a little more of a picture in her in your head of her. Come on back. Try it again.
36:58
S0
You're not maintaining much of a picture.
37:01
S4
You're gonna lose a good.
37:02
S0
Yeah. You need to have a sufficient attention span that you can hold them when they go away because they're gonna go away. If you hold them, you've still got them when they come back. You can't lose anything ever.
37:25
S0
You're still losing it. So you're gonna have to develop the ability to have the attention span so that you can hold her while she's not there. Otherwise, who's gonna hold her?
37:39
S0
Who's gonna hold her while she's at work? Who's gonna hold her while she's somewhere else? You need to be able to hold her wherever she is. Otherwise, what the heck's the point? Otherwise, you need some sort of proximity, and then you don't even like the some sort of proximity, so you make up a whole bunch of things that they have to do if they're gonna prove to you that they like you.
38:04
S0
You have to take out the garbage. You have to do this. You have to do that. All of this is strictly from you not being able to carry them in your own head. What if you got them in your own head?
38:17
S0
I got her.
38:19
S4
And you can carry that around with you. I
38:22
S0
can't not.
38:25
S0
I can't not. I can't lose her. And you can't hold her unless she fulfills certain criteria. Right now, proximity later on makes the bed and prepares dinner and whatever. You get it? Mhmm. You guys do this. Right? You start to make up all of these things that have to be fulfilled in order to indicate that she's there. What if she's already here? Then she doesn't have to do anything. Then you got a game that's calibrating to zero again. Remember me mentioning calibrating to zero? What if you didn't what if they didn't have to be a high jumper?
39:10
S0
Jumping over these things that you put in their way? What if you could just carry them right here?
39:18
S0
I gotcha.
39:21
S0
Do you know that?
39:23
S0
I got you all in the first old maybe minute. You're done for me. Our relationship is complete. It is. Who do you know who you care for, who your relationship is complete with? You keep it incomplete on purpose. You pretend like it's I I mean, you do all this weird stuff with it. You get it? What if it's already complete? What if it's already taken care of? Then whether she's standing over here or standing over here or standing over here or standing over here or standing over here or standing right here. Mhmm.
40:13
S0
You can flirt with her when she's 30 miles away. And you know what? These bodies have the receptacles to pick that up. But if if you bother to work on your subtlety,
40:29
S0
It's already working, you guys. You guys just won't let it work. You won't let yourselves perceive that it works. What if she can't abandon you for nothing?
40:42
S0
She could fall over dead this moment, and you've still got her hair. Or she could be right in front of you kissing you, and you don't have her hair. Takes a lot of work
40:54
S4
not to have her there too.
40:55
S0
It takes a lot of work not to have her Mhmm.
40:59
S4
It does. Yeah. That's what that's what's coming
41:01
S0
How many of you have had sex and not had the other person there? It's a gross thing.
41:11
S0
Or say at a dinner and not have I'm off somewhere else. Sorry. Well, you're always off so yeah. Sorry.
41:20
S0
Well, if you hold her here, you're going to become an argument for her existence on the planet. That's gonna be pretty interesting to her. Not a conditional argument for existence, but a real argument for Wouldn't that be weird? All of a sudden, he becomes a resource by his variability to think. Not variability, very ability to think.
41:51
S0
You make it conditional and you make it superficial. You make it way out there in the superficial. You didn't take the garbage out. You don't love me anymore. Any of you ever done this?
42:05
S0
Mhmm. And I guess that's because you don't wanna get hurt. Yeah. It's a protection game.
42:10
S4
Protection against Linda.
42:11
S0
It's a protection game. What if you could run her anytime? Right there. He there she is. There's Linda.
42:21
S0
It doesn't matter to me what she does. She can't bust us up.
42:29
S0
If she looks at me and screams, did you call me an asshole? She still can't bust us up.
42:36
S0
If she gets out of the course and goes home and says, what a jerk, what a terrible waste of time, she can't bust us up anyway.
42:45
S0
And I continue to store not only her, but also her progress. So I become an argument for her process progress.
42:58
S0
It's not hard.
43:01
S0
To not do this is hard. Mhmm. To do this is easy. To do this, all I gotta do is have enough attention to go around. But there is a disability that comes with it because I can't look at him and not still create her.
43:17
S0
I can look him and create him, but I'm still creating her. And when I turn from him to her, I've still got him, but you don't because you shut down in between. It's not necessary. What if one of your seven plus or minus two was everything?
43:44
S0
Didn't think of that, did you? No. What what what if one of your seven plus or minus two was everything? Then you'd always have everything.
43:56
S0
I didn't tell you there was a limit to the size it could be, did I? There's not.
44:05
S0
I can't lose it.
44:08
S0
And you get so full you can't hold it.
44:15
S0
A bit can be any size.